So.. I admit it. One of my worst habits is I swear. I was raised not to use bad language, in fact we weren’t even allowed to say “stupid” or “shut up.” I vividly remember a time I said something (although I admit I don’t remember which “bad” word it is I said) and my mom washed my mouth out with soap. In fact she rubbed soap on my front teeth so that afterward, if I talked, laughed or even breathed hard, bubbles shot out of my mouth. I was young, and apparently not smart enough to think of brushing my teeth to get the taste out of my mouth. I also remember a time we were playing a rhyming game where you just rhyme words (I know, soooo fun!) and accidentally we came up with a bad word. I don’t know how we knew it was one of the really bad ones, but we knew it. So how did I get to the point I am now?

It started in grade four.

Ruth (not my sister, a chubby girl in my class who was whiter than me) and I were in the classroom, right at the start of recess. I don’t know why we were lagging behind, but we were up at Mr. Wortman’s desk (yes, that’s his real name). She said, “I don’t believe you really swear.” And I looked her straight in the eye and said, “%$&@ you!” and walked out of the classroom.

I’m not proud of the fact that I swear, and I have really tried to stop. The thing is, I censor myself fairly well. With my family, around small children, nothing pops out. But when I’m ranting and raving to a friend, out spews language that would make a sailor stop dead. Yeah, it can be bad.

I didn’t realize how bad until M and I were talking a while ago. He said there was ONE THING he’d want to change about me, and that was it. It kind of surprised me at first, but the more I’ve thought about it, the more I agree. The thing is, in writing, I don’t like swearing. When a blogger swears too much, I feel uncomfortable in a strange way. Sure, a bad word here or there isn’t a big deal. But when it’s F this and F that and you B and bla bla bla.. it’s too much.

My mom always said that people who swear do it because they are not educated and don’t know enough good words. I don’t 100% agree with that, but I do agree that constantly swearing does sound uneducated. And, I figure if I’m censoring that when around some of my favorite people, why do I do it at all?

And on top of everything else, I want to be a Mom someday. I can’t talk like that if I’m someone’s Mom.

So I’m going to stop. I am sure I’ll slip up sometimes, especially when I’m upset about something, but I’m going to do it. Please, if you catch me slip up, call me on it. But please don’t use a bar of soap. That tasted really gross.